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A few words from Big Dog's favorite talking animal


Believe me, I am not going to be taking over this blog. I only have a brain the size of a lime, and my people have brains the size of cauliflowers. So I can't compete with that. I have them where I want them anyway. It's not every dog that can talk his human blogger into giving him some space, but mine does. He calls me Gulliver. I call him Big Dog. He wears a blue t-shirt sometimes that says right on it: "Big Dog." It makes me proud.

His job is media, and he knows how important animals are to media. He says: "Can animals talk?" "Yes!" I say. He says: "Who's the most famous talking animal in the world today?" I say: "Snoopy!" Can you imagine "Peanuts" without Snoopy? I can't. He is even on some of the blimps that fly through my sky yard. (If you click on the picture once, then twice, you can see Snoopy flying the blimp!) No, Big Dog says, Snoopy is pretty famous, but not this famous. What is the answer? Mickey Mouse! A mouse! A brain the size of a lentil! But Mickey presides over a multi-billion-dollar international entertainment corporation. It goes to show you, brain size doesn't always matter.

Then Big Dog says: "You know who my favorite talking animal is?" I shake my head. "You!" he says, and scratches me just below my ear, where I like it. Last week, when Bo, the First Dog, got an op-ed in The New York Times, Big Dog agreed that I should have some blog time, too. Now my dog brothers and sisters suddenly seem to be all over the papers, and on TV. Maybe they were always there and I just didn't notice.

The Times really seems to be going to the dogs. I don't say that as a bad thing. On Monday, they introduced a new feature, "The Puppy Diaries: Taking the Plunge With a New Dog." Is that cool, or what? This morning, Wednesday, two days later, that story is still No. 2 on the Times' "Most Popular Email" list. Dogs rule! Dog stories got legs! I bet you I could live to be two hundred and never see a story like that about cats.

The star of that story is Scout, who is a golden retriever. The story says Scout's breeder thoroughly checked out the people who wanted to take her home. The writer of the story, Jill Abramson, was tickled, but didn't seem to mind, because she knows that dogs are worth it. She is going to write every Monday about what it is like, "raising a puppy through its first year of life." Scout, just go on the paper and you've got it made. Jill says: "Somehow I had forgotten how much having a new puppy is like having a new baby." It brings a tear to my eye. I had to go over to Big Dog and give him a nostalgic tap on the leg with my muzzle.

There was another big story, happening right here in San Diego, but it made the national news. This one was about playing tapes of dogs barking, to chase the seals out of Children's Cove, down in La Jolla. They are ready to spend $700,000 on the project. That's a lot of Science Diet! I hereby notify the City of San Diego that I will do the job, in person, for only $350,000. Contact Big Dog.

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Very cute. I like it.

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  • I am a journalist, educator, writing consultant and author, living in La Mesa, CA. I am a native of Texas, which shows in most of my work. I believe that anything is possible. When I was 35, I realized that the ideal life would be to have the imagination of a six-year-old, and the wisdom of a 65-year-old. I can still get to the imagination (as you can, simply by cutting away all the data you’ve learned from first grade on) and I now possess the wisdom of a 65-year-old. Being 65 can be unsettling – too late to plant trees and enjoy the shade – but the wisdom that comes with it is terrific compensation. I learned in 50th grade that, no matter how bad things get, there is always compensation. Now I am in the 60th grade, and I am learning things that I didn’t know in 59th. This September, I’ll start 61st grade, and learn things I don’t know now. To find what grade you’re in, start with the year you started 12th grade, and count up. My newest book is “Warbirds – How They Played the Game.” My new company is The Write Outsource, quality media writing on deadline, at www.writeoutsource.com. I am working on a book about the media, and I am about to revise my cookbook about home cooking on a tight budget, such as so many of us face at this time.
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